TO PARTICIPATE OR NOT . . .

I attended the first of 4 sessions with Betsey Downing last night.  A nice potpourri class that was do-able and enjoyable.  As we rolled up our mats, she announced that this afternoon's practice will be 'backbends', my nemesis, my dvesha poses.

So, as I sit here this morning, I am struggling with my desire (or lack thereof) to attend.  Should I just skip it?  I envision everyone reading this screaming (either out loud or to themselves), "NO!"  Further, they are saying, "you need to get back in the backbend saddle".  True dat.

I have circuitously avoided backbends (in particular, urdhva dhanurasana) for the many months I have been in Fallbrook.  It's easy; I just don't practice them.  In a class, I choose bridge; if asked, I would feign a sore shoulder, or some such malady (I really do have a sore right shoulder, at times.).

So now, here I am all signed up. Enthusiastic to study with Betsey. On the verge of 'chickening out' because of one pose.

For a few minutes, let's think about something else.  Yesterday was one of the rainiest we've spent at this new home in Fallbrook.  It was great to hear the rain hitting the ground and to know that our avocado and citrus trees will be soaking up all that moisture.  It was also a day with lots of comings and goings:  contractor here to install a couple lights; people picking up dog-loos we had sold on Craigslist; and a young woman picking up a box of classical music (also a Craigslist sale).  What's left to sell?  Probably lots of stuff, but right now the only listing that remains is the chandelier from our dining room (the one we replaced yesterday with our 'traveling' chandelier).

When we lived in Nashville, we purchased a solid brass chandelier -- simple design and HEAVY.  Over the years, as we've bought and sold houses, down comes the chandelier to be replaced with something a future owner might like. We pack it up and it moves with us.  For a few of those moves, I helped my husband install it.  After a few, we figured out that our marital sanity deserved better - so, now we hire someone to take it down and re-install it.  Brass is 'out' according to interior design magazines; I figured that much out during this last home sale and purchase. But, the 'traveling' chandelier has too many memories, it makes our house truly our home, it makes me happy to look at it.  Besides what goes around, comes around -- brass will be 'in' again someday.

Now back to the workshop.  I'll go; swallow my pride -- because that is really what's stopping me, my ego.  To be a yoga teacher in a room of studied yogis and not be able to achieve a pose is really what holds me back.  And, yes - I know, if I practiced the pose, it wouldn't be this way.  But, it is.  Maybe this is what it takes to kick my you-know-what back into action.  We'll see.

And, tomorrow?  Handstands.  I may be writing the same post tomorrow -- just changing the words a bit.

Hope our Saturdays go well,