Wednesday, September 21, 2011

SHARING GRATITUDE

There are many times I think "I sure appreciate what that person does/did for me." Few are the times I have stopped to verbalize or write my gratitude. I am changing that.

I recently took the opportunity to thank one of my teachers (Adam Ballenger) for his advice on accepting feedback. What was it? "Just listen. Don't be defensive, don't offer excuses; just listen." This advice has served me well. I use it every time one of my mentors or reviewers, a student, a fellow teacher -- anyone -- offers me feedback. I 'just listen'.
Interesting that, if the feedback is other-than-complimentary, I know what will be said. Tough to listen to it being verbalized, tho. Sometimes, like when I am told about my 'parrot words', I haven't a clue that I've been saying the word 'bring' or 'take' or 'gently' over and over, ad nauseum. Add to that the feedback moments when you get a gem handed to you; for example, 'just listen'. All good stuff, whether we want to hear it or not.
No matter the content -- good or otherwise, the next step is to say 'thank you', without offering explanations, excuses, reasons, etc. Example: Comment: "That's a nice outfit." My old response: "Oh, it's just something I've had forever." My new response: "Thank you". This is not easy for me. I am not very good at accepting compliments. This trait became painfully clear after the videotaping of my recent classes -- people telling me how good I was, how much they enjoyed the class, how much better they felt. My response? I said 'thank you', but inside my head there was a voice telling me this can't be for me. What's that about? Why is it so hard to accept praise? to accept this gift. A contemplation, for sure.
A contemplation that Sundari would like me to embrace more emphatically, accept the praise, accept that I am doing a good job. I am getting better at it, still some work to do. I thank Sundari for pointing that out to me and challenging me to just say 'thank you', to accept (and embrace) the praise.
So, 4 words to live by -- 'Thank You" and "just listen".
I have many more teachers (too many to name here) and each has offered me 'gems' of knowledge that I treasure. I pull them out frequently and share them with my classes. Sharing them is one way to honor my lineage of guides on this journey.
Thank you all!
Have a great Wednesday,

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